'Step away from the door...'

Hello, everyone.

I'm back from a quick trip to the UK, where people look very miserable, and London Mayor Boris Johnson wants to build an airport on a river.

But here's a tip for travellers, at least on Emirates' new A380 Whalejet: DON'T TOUCH THE DOORS.

(In this context, "doors" means those big things on the outside of the plane, not toilets, etc.)

It seems the A380 (and poss other planes?) have cameras everywhere, which apparently picked me up "touching" the door, which roused the captain's suspicions that I was about to pull the Big Lever and plunge the jet screaming into the middle of Turkey.

For the record, I was LOOKING OUT OF THE WINDOW in the door, while I waited for one of the crew to find something.

Nevertheless, I was taken aside by the purser, and asked if everything was ok, and to check I didn't unaccountably feel like playing with the slide at 39,000 feet. I said I was fine.

So, frequent flyers, beware! Your captain is watching you...

Oh, site stuff - you might notice a few things appearing or disappearing from the AdNation homepage, and some random stuff every now and again. We're tweaking the site, so do bear with us, keep your seatbelt fastened when the seatbelt sign is on, and rest assured that we have your saftey at heart.